It’s true. I am attracted to people who are completely honest. I love this quote:
“Honesty is the highest form of intimacy in a relationship.”
Do I appreciate honesty? Yes
Do I want my friends and family to be completely honest with me? Yes
Does honesty hurt sometimes? Yes (yes indeed)
Can honesty motivate me? Yes
Do I know how to be tactful with my honesty? Yes
While the truth may hurt at times, I am one of those who will embrace it. “If you get people to be honest with you, and then you respond in a way that makes them regret having done so, you’re worse off than when you started.” Since I like and seek honest feedback, I know I need to listen carefully. There are times when I will want to disagree, get upset…especially if it is hard to hear. But I know if I consistently disagree, it will make them not want to approach me with honesty in the future. If it hurts or I disagree, I should question to understand why. (I continue to work on this!) Then once the person feels heard, and I still disagree, then I know to explain my point of view…calmly.
When it comes to my work life, I always thank my colleagues for their honesty because I know they are looking out for me in the long run and want me to be successful. “If you want people to feel like it is really worth their while to honest with you, change your behavior as a result of what you hear.” No, this does not have to happen all the time. If someone tells me they are not a fan of my hair or work clothes, most likely, I will continue to wear my hair and clothes that are comfortable to me. But, if they tell me that my behavior at meetings is distracting or unproductive, I will make the change!
One of my favorite quotes from the late John Lennon, “Being honest may not you a lot of friends, but it will get you good ones.” These are the people who are strong enough to take the truth, and to give it back to you, when you need it most. How could you trust your friends if you felt they wouldn’t tell you the truth? How could you rely on them if you weren’t sure if they were being honest? Surround yourself with people you can trust. You know the type of people you need in your life. One of my favorite things about my closest relationships is our ability to be honest with each other.
Can you be brutally honest and still be tactful? Absolutely! Some can tell a painful truth in a comforting manner. Others will hit you with the truth in a manner which is blunt and painful. If you are giving honest feedback, take a moment and consider how you would respond to the delivery. Also, if you know that your intentions are good and you are at peace with your words, you should not feel guilty.
Below is an excerpt of an article I read not long ago.
Why Honesty is the Best Policy for Simplicity
Consider the benefits of a honest lifestyle:
Closer friendships. Honesty and integrity pave the way for greater intimacy. Your friends love the “true you,” not the one you’ve artificially created.
Higher quality friends. Honesty attracts honesty. People who are trustworthy and honest attract trustworthy and honest friends. And those are the best friends to have.
Trust. Honest people are trusted by others.
Confidence. Honest people trust themselves. Never underestimate the life-changing power of the ability to trust yourself.
Wellness. Honesty has been linked to less colds, less fatigue, less depression, and less anxiety.
Less stress. Dishonesty needs to be maintained. Pretending to be something you are not requires constant attention to detail, even for the most experienced. Honest people are better able to relax because they are just being themselves and naturally, feel better about themselves and less overwhelmed.
To all my Fuel The Soul friends…I HONESTLY appreciate you 🙂